It was three years ago when I felt God say to me, “I am not like your father.” I instinctively knew what he meant. He meant that he wasn’t like my earthly father. I had a hard time trusting God sometimes, I didn’t have any hard feelings towards him and I’d worked through a lot of anger and disappointment. However, I didn’t have a deep and loving relationship that I wanted and I think it was colored by my relationship with my dad.
There was something I held back for sure, so when I heard this message it made me want to explore more of what he meant.
Even though my dad was abusive, there were good qualities about him too. However, it was definitely hard for me to trust. To trust others, to trust myself self and obviously to trust God.
Seeking God as a Loving Dad
I went on a deeper journey to discover who God the heavenly Father was and what he thought of me. I read the Bible and I contemplated, meditated, and journaled a lot while talking to and listening to that small still voice inside. I discovered many meaningful things in those back and forth conversations in my journal. Here’s just a few:
- I was created in love.
- I was given gifts and talents to use for good and to help others.
- I am his beloved daughter, I am wanted, I am good, loved, cherished, and provided for.
- That what my father did was wrong but that the negative beliefs and shame I took on because of what he did are not true, the truth is that in God’s eyes I am lovable and deserving of love.
I’m far from perfect but as a loving dad, God is patient with me and loves me in spite of my faults. As a mom of five kids, I know what that means, you just love your kids no matter what. If I had to jump in front of a train to protect them, I would. God is the same he sent his only son to die for us, out of love for us.
The bible says, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have everlasting life.”
Always a Happy Father’s Day despite having trapped trauma
My hopes for you if you are hurting from not having a safe, nurturing, relationship with your dad, try reaching out to your loving Dad in heaven. He can handle your feelings and wants more than anything to have a loving relationship with you. Often people are angry at God for allowing them to have to go through such trauma. I know I was but he is open to working on that with you if you give him a chance. Some people don’t even want to use the word, God because it has such negative connotations for them and honestly a lot of religious people have not represented God well at all. Check out my blog on “Who is God”.
If you have trauma you need to heal it. One way to do that is with epigenetic techniques such as EFT, Matrix Reimprinting, and the therapeutic model of IFS (Internal Family Systems). Our physical body responds to trauma by creating a trauma capsule which if unhealed and trapped, affects our body, mind, and spirit. If your dad had emotional issues, he probably had trapped trauma and his fears were expressed through his behavior.
At last, science is now talking about the fact that trauma is passed down through the generations. (check out the link below for Dr. Bruce Lipton’s seminal work on genes. He was the first scientist to come out and say that it is the beliefs that are passed down through the generations that affect our gene expression). Our beliefs affect every aspect of our lives.
Journaling and God
A really great way to gain self-awareness and to have a conversation with God as your loving dad is to journal. Here’s some easy ways to begin:
- Write a half to a page of things you are grateful for. They can be really simple things, such as thanks for a beautiful day, a restful sleep, your rent paid, etc. Gratitude creates greater happiness, improves self-esteem, helps you to feel more positive emotions, sleep better, relish good experiences, improves your physical and psychological health, helps you to deal with adversity, lowers aggression, and helps you build strong relationships. I can’t recommend it enough and it is such an easy thing to do!
When you write out what you are grateful for (at least about a half page or more) it puts you into your heart space and out of your head. When we are in our heart space it is easier to hear from God.
- Next ask God some questions such as:
- Who do you say that I am?
- What would you like to say to me today? I’m all ears and I long to hear your voice.
- What would you like to teach me today?
- What should I do or not do about this situation (either your job, career, business, or relationship)?
Just let your writing flow without judging what you are writing. Try to keep your mind off editing and just let whatever comes to flow through your pen. The part of your brain that easily hears from God is the same part of the brain where your imagination is. As with anything, the more you do this the easier it gets. You start to trust in the process and receive more and more insights.
Consistency will reap results!
If you hear anything negative that’s not God. His voice is always encouraging, positive, loving and uplifting!
If you have any questions or comments, don’t hesitate to reach out.
Our Worth to God:- https://www.openbible.info/topics/our_worth_to_god